IRL : random moments from a day seemingly without end

i.

Earlier today, my co-worker, SevenFeet, handed me The Zombie Survival Guide: Complete Protection from the Living Dead. *gives devil horns*

Oh. Yes. Rock, indeed.

ii.

"Brown took over FEMA in 2003 with little experience in emergency management. He joined the agency in 2001 as legal counsel to his college friend, then-FEMA director Joe Allbaugh, who was Bush's 2000 campaign manager. When Allbaugh left FEMA in 2003 Brown assumed the top job.

Before joining the Bush administration, Brown spent a decade as the stewards and judges commissioner of the International Arabian Horse Association."

CNN. “’Can I quit now?’ FEMA chief wrote as Katrina raged.” http://www.cnn.com/2005/US/11/03/brown.fema.emails/index.html (November 3, 2005) Emphasis mine.

One cannot help
but be reminded of an SNL skit
featuring Will Ferrell as GWB
wherein he is giving an Oval Office broadcast
after what would appear to be a nuclear holocaust
and while he ducks the ostriches,
marvels, “This is hard!”

But, boy-howdy, “Brownie, you’re doing a heck of a job.”

iii.

Every single day (every single day), I receive the same piece of spam courtesy of my company’s listserv. The sender’s moniker rotates through 5 or 6 nonsensical nom de plumes, but the subject line is always the same.

Penis Launcher.

iv. - addendum to iii.

My mind conjures all manner of fantastical devices when turned to the question of what the Penis Launcher may look like and of how it may function. I shared this with Co-worker SevenFeet. He logically volunteered that it is most likely a pump of some kind, a contraption that promises to increase size, perhaps even stamina.

But every application of free association, for me, produces images of a 45 degree angled missile launcher armed with what else but a disembodied phallus.

SevenFeet agreed, and noted that this launcher's payload should, preferably, hit its target slightly off-sides to the hollow of the cheek, with a square plop.

I was so relieved that somebody else understood.